Why Your Child Isn't Listening, and How to Change Your Situation Immediately

Regardless of the age or development level of your child, he or she is still subject to the basic laws of psychology. The reason for most children’s behavioral issues is their own rational, predictable response to psychological triggers.

What this means is that you are NOT a bad parent, you are NOT failing, and your child is NOT a bad kid. Most importantly, it means that a switch in your psychological approach with your child will bring new and better results.

Most of the decisions that we as humans make are subconscious, and this includes children and teenagers. Therefore, surface level demands such as “clean your room,” will do little to get your child to behave automatically.

There are two types of reasoning: explicit and implicit reasoning. Explicit reasoning is from external factors, such as a parent demanding that a child do something. Implicit reasoning, on the other hand, is when an individual makes a decision him or herself. Implicit reasoning is much more powerful than explicit reasoning, because we tend to defend the beliefs that we conclude ourselves.

For example, your child is much more likely to clean his or her room if he or she DECIDES to, instead of you demanding that it is done. This simple bit of psychology completely changes the way that children make decisions regarding whether or not to listen to you.

THIS simple rule taps into the psychology of your child’s behavior and brings instantaneous change to his or her behavior.

Children and teenagers (and adults) are equally subject to the laws of psychology, so the quickest and most effective way to make children obey, behave, and stop acting out is to trigger their minds to make the decision themselves. Simply making demands fails to work because you serve as an outside influence to your child’s world.

Regardless of their behavior, your child’s actions are rational in his or her own mind. On a basic level, their ability to rationalize their behavior can come down to “I don’t want to do it, therefore I will not.” (Or, on a toddler’s level, “I don’t wanna!”) Because of this, altering their response is as easy as changing the approach.

You can raise your voice, inflict punishment, invoke professionals, and establish rules, but all serve as outside influences to your child that foster resentment, tantums, and rebelliousness. On the other hand, tapping into basic child psychology results in instantaneous change and a more well-behaved, obedient child.