Why Your Child Isn't Listening, and How to Change Your Situation Immediately

Regardless of the age or development level of your child, he or she is still subject to the basic laws of psychology. The reason for most children’s behavioral issues is their own rational, predictable response to psychological triggers.

What this means is that you are NOT a bad parent, you are NOT failing, and your child is NOT a bad kid. Most importantly, it means that a switch in your psychological approach with your child will bring new and better results.

Most of the decisions that we as humans make are subconscious, and this includes children and teenagers. Therefore, surface level demands such as “clean your room,” will do little to get your child to behave automatically.

There are two types of reasoning: explicit and implicit reasoning. Explicit reasoning is from external factors, such as a parent demanding that a child do something. Implicit reasoning, on the other hand, is when an individual makes a decision him or herself. Implicit reasoning is much more powerful than explicit reasoning, because we tend to defend the beliefs that we conclude ourselves.

For example, your child is much more likely to clean his or her room if he or she DECIDES to, instead of you demanding that it is done. This simple bit of psychology completely changes the way that children make decisions regarding whether or not to listen to you.

THIS simple rule taps into the psychology of your child’s behavior and brings instantaneous change to his or her behavior.

Children and teenagers (and adults) are equally subject to the laws of psychology, so the quickest and most effective way to make children obey, behave, and stop acting out is to trigger their minds to make the decision themselves. Simply making demands fails to work because you serve as an outside influence to your child’s world.

Regardless of their behavior, your child’s actions are rational in his or her own mind. On a basic level, their ability to rationalize their behavior can come down to “I don’t want to do it, therefore I will not.” (Or, on a toddler’s level, “I don’t wanna!”) Because of this, altering their response is as easy as changing the approach.

You can raise your voice, inflict punishment, invoke professionals, and establish rules, but all serve as outside influences to your child that foster resentment, tantums, and rebelliousness. On the other hand, tapping into basic child psychology results in instantaneous change and a more well-behaved, obedient child.

Resources for Instantaneous Change

Changing your child’s behavioral problems are important for your own health and stress levels, in addition to the child’s. While you obviously want to see change as quickly as possible, the longer you wait to initiate change, the more resistant your child can become. Therefore, I recommend these programs as aids to bringing about fast and permanent change in your child:

Dream Child Method: My #1 recommendation for parents of teens and young children alike, because it deals with the psychology of your child’s behavior. Josh Waldman’s hypnotherapy background helped him to develop the Dream Child Method, which brings about instantaneous results from your misbehaving child. Watch this video for more on the Dream Child Method.

My Out of Control Teen: A fantastic alternative to hiring a professional to sit down with your child, My Out of Control Teen contains audio and video recordings of teenage behavior expert Mark Hutten’s interactions with parents going through the same challenges you are. When you complete the course, you’ll not only have the ability to drastically change your home situation, but you’ll be able to help your friends and family going through the same scenario.

The Behavior Solution: Written by a real mom who found a way to tap into her child’s psychology, The Behavior Solution is a practical way to make changes in your child’s behavior and is written specifically for real-life parents.

Talking to Toddlers: This low-cost audio course explains how to communicate with young children and change their behavior problems. Recommended specifically for parents with toddles and young children.

Parenting a Rebellious Teen - One Essential Ingredient

Parenting a Rebellious Teen - One Essential Ingredient
By [http://ezinearticles.com/?expert=Tina_Lovell]Tina Lovell

If you are the parent of a teenager, I am sure your patience has been tested more than once. In addition, if you are the parent of a rebellious teen, your job is probably even more trying. So what can you do as a parent, to really help a difficult teen? I think the most important quality you can have is to be unrelenting. Do not ever give up on them, on helping them, standing by them, or on parenting them. If you do, who else will they have?

As parents, our job is to love our children unconditionally as we guide them through childhood and into adulthood. No matter how much they test us, fight us, argue with, ignore us or rebel, we must be persistent as parents. There will always be those difficult days...the days when we are exhausted, frustrated, disappointed and overwhelmed, but every day ends and a new one follows. Keep that in mind. Time is not infinite. There is always an end. Be unrelenting.

So how can you be relentless as a parent? A few things that come to mind are to stay active and involved in their life, pursue them and show attentiveness in what interests them. Attend any events they may have, or accept and participate in any of their leisurely activities that you can. For instance, if you have a child who likes to ride skateboards, go and watch them at the skate park, get to know their friends, maybe attend a professional event with them, like the Dew Tour. Whatever it is they are currently passionate about, get interested in too. Also, be sure to let your teen know that you will always be there for them and that you are always available to listen.

Another part of being relentless is choosing to never give up. No matter how hard a situation gets, be willing to learn more, to seek answers, to find the help you need. Nobody is born knowing all there is to being a parent. Therefore, learning is going to be a part of the process. It is imperative that you remain willing to continue reaching out, to keep trying, and to keep learning. It is then, that you will remain close to your child, even through those rebellious teenage years.

Tina is a happily married WAHM of 4 boys, a freelance writer and advocate for families and parents. She enjoys seeing stressed out parents and broken relationships put back together.
Family life is great, and if things are difficult and unhappy at home, then you must find the help you need to restore things once again. Your family can be happy, but it may take some work to get there.

If you found her tips useful and want to read more in depth material about helping your out of control child or teenager then visit her here at: [http://www.squidoo.com/Out_Of_Control_teen]Out of Control Teenager
or at [http://www.squidoo.com/Oppsitional-Defiant-Children]Parenting A Difficult Child

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Tina_Lovell http://EzineArticles.com/?Parenting-a-Rebellious-Teen---One-Essential-Ingredient&id=2363521